顧問姓名：馬麗玲 Mary
顧問簡介：51offer資深文書顧問，英語專業(yè)畢業(yè)，熱愛英語寫作，擅長商科、人文社科和傳媒等多個方向的文書撰寫、材料翻譯及處理，文書創(chuàng)作融個性、情感與邏輯于一體，善于挖掘?qū)W生經(jīng)歷，引導(dǎo)幫助學(xué)生發(fā)掘自身優(yōu)勢，打造出一份讓招生官眼前一亮的個性化文書，且運(yùn)用其扎實的英語功底和獨特的創(chuàng)新思維認(rèn)真對待每一份文書，在文書中充分展現(xiàn)學(xué)生對專業(yè)的熱愛，并進(jìn)行有特色的背景包裝。細(xì)心負(fù)責(zé)，力求每一位學(xué)生對文書的滿意和認(rèn)可。
成功案例展示
Mary老師曾成功幫助眾多學(xué)生拿到QS前100院校的錄取，能夠結(jié)合經(jīng)驗和了解的行業(yè)背景，在文書寫作體現(xiàn)出獨特的見解，針對不同的學(xué)生創(chuàng)作出個性化的申請文書吸引admissions committee的眼球，助力學(xué)生實現(xiàn)夢校追求，下面給大家展示一個商科案例，給大家感受一下Mary老師的寫作實力！
案例A：
陳同學(xué)
陳同學(xué)，四川某雙非院校財務(wù)管理專業(yè)畢業(yè)，均分83.5，四年科技公司財務(wù)部門工作經(jīng)驗，想繼續(xù)申請F(tuán)inance方向的專業(yè)，學(xué)生只是簡單說明了申請動機(jī)是出于職業(yè)晉升需要，這樣的動機(jī)過于單調(diào)，為了能突出該動機(jī)同時豐富學(xué)生自身對行業(yè)的理解，在文書寫作時，Mary老師以剛剛落幕的博鰲亞洲論壇上中國人民銀行行長易綱的發(fā)言作為一個行業(yè)背景來描寫申請人想要去英國學(xué)習(xí)的動機(jī)。既結(jié)合了當(dāng)下時事說明了行業(yè)對于人才的迫切需求，也從學(xué)生角度表明她認(rèn)識到進(jìn)一步學(xué)習(xí)專業(yè)知識的必要性，這樣精彩的開頭充實且細(xì)化了學(xué)生的申請動機(jī)。此外，后續(xù)的段落中也對學(xué)生提供的經(jīng)歷進(jìn)行了拓展，帶入真情實感描述學(xué)生的成長，生動的表達(dá)提高了讀者的代入感。讓讀者感受到學(xué)生與所申請專業(yè)的匹配度，幫助學(xué)生提升申請競爭力。
In the Boao Forum for Asia Annual Conference 2018 that recently came to an end, Mr. Yi Gang, the Governor of the People's Bank of China, announced that China will further expand the opening up of the financial industry. The upper limit of foreign shareholding ratio in financial organisations such as banks, financial asset management companies, securities companies, fund management companies, futures companies, and personal insurance companies will be loosened and even canceled, which will surely bring great opportunities for financial practitioners. I believe that this will further promote the development of China's financial industry and will also consequentially lead to an increasing demand for highly qualified financial personnel with professional financial knowledge and techniques and international perspectives as well as skill set to deal with the increasingly complex financial, investment and risk control work. However, opportunities and challenges coexist. Inevitably, this will also bring about more challenges to financial practitioners. To better prepare myself for the forthcoming opportunities and challenges, I plan to further my learning in finance in the UK at the postgraduate level.
案例B：
侯同學(xué)
侯同學(xué)，本科計算機(jī)科學(xué)與技術(shù)專業(yè)，均分75，申請Computer Science相關(guān)專業(yè)，學(xué)生自身有比較多相關(guān)經(jīng)驗，對專業(yè)也有一定的理解，本科期間多次參與項目的研究和創(chuàng)造，并且畢業(yè)后一直從事計算機(jī)行業(yè)的工作。對于這樣經(jīng)歷豐富的學(xué)生，在文書的寫作中就必須篩選有關(guān)信息，串聯(lián)學(xué)生經(jīng)歷，層層遞進(jìn)突顯學(xué)生的優(yōu)勢。Mary老師深諳其道，在文書開頭就開門見山強(qiáng)調(diào)學(xué)生多年的工作經(jīng)驗告訴他IT行業(yè)一直是而且將繼續(xù)是一個有前途的行業(yè)，由此引出動機(jī)；在描述學(xué)生的項目經(jīng)歷時，寫作邏輯清晰，采用總分總式結(jié)構(gòu)詳述學(xué)生在理論學(xué)習(xí)與實踐經(jīng)驗之間的能力轉(zhuǎn)化，從而突出學(xué)生扎實的專業(yè)技能。
Rather than confining myself to academic study, I actively took part in practical projects to develop my programming proficiency. In the second term of my freshman year, I generated the idea of developing a takeout network platform after hearing my classmates complaining about the takeout service of some large platforms. Without any delay, I called several classmates together and started the project. As the team leader, I assigned the tasks such as demand analysis, product design and code compilation to different members according to the field of their expertise or preference. I myself achieved the synchronization of the communication between the server and clients of the platform through Java. We all made arduous efforts, but to our relief, the platform we developed had won us great praise from the restaurant owners around our university and our schoolmates. Subsequent to this project, I participated in another project as the team leader to develop The Game of Killing through C#. Together with my team members, we designed many programmes and spent endless hours debugging our codes. The game was promoted among the dormitories rapidly only a few days after its launch. Apart from gaining practical programming skills through these projects, I also strengthened my analytical ability, teamwork ability, leadership, and communication skills.
顧問感言
文書是每一位學(xué)生在申請過程中的重要環(huán)節(jié)，意味著我承載著學(xué)生對我的信任和期許，我希望竭盡所能，用我的寫作經(jīng)驗和英語知識助力學(xué)生實現(xiàn)他們的名校夢，在這個過程中，我會面對不同的學(xué)生，感受他們不同的人生經(jīng)歷，收獲更多的寫作經(jīng)驗，何嘗不是在與學(xué)生們一起成長為更好的自己呢。其實每當(dāng)看到學(xué)生拿到心儀學(xué)校的offer，這也是意味著自己付出的努力得到了肯定，我會像自己拿到offer一樣開心，或許這就是工作給予我的回報與快樂吧。
